Hey there Delilah (I'm at the MTC)

The 17th of Never

While out tracting for those prepared to hear the gospel message one hot summer day, I was greeted by a young man from Santo Domingo.

When we asked if his parents were home, he said “Let me check.” He came back a moment later and said that we would have to return.

Thinking that this might be an opportunity to share the message we had come so far to share, we got excited and said, “OK, great! When can we come back then?”

“The 17^th.” Was his reply. Whipping out our weekly planners, my companion missionary said, “The 17^th of June, then?”

“No” he said- “the 17^th of never.”

I’ll never forget how slick this kid was or just how deadpan was his delivery. I mean, it was spot on, as if he had rehearsed it for months. My wife and I today use this sarcastically when we joke about things that we are sure will never happen. When should we get caught up on all the laundry? The 17^th. When are we going to break down and put in our landscaping? Well, I’ve got some free time on the 17^th… Jim A. - Utah

Missionary Story from The "Hood"

I served in an economically and spiritually depressed area of New Jersey, in a small town known as Camden that sat on the banks of the Delaware River directly across from Philadelphia. This town was once the crown jewel of New Jersey, but was now overcome with crime, government corruption, and poverty. The air was heavy with defeat.

On one particular occasion, as my companion and I were out “tocando puertas” or knocking on doors, we came across a young latino boy who was very scrawny and couldn’t have been more than 11 years of age, although from his WWF t-shirt, large diamond stud earrings, and menacing scowl on his face it was apparent that he thought he was pretty hardcore.

My companion began to introduce us as special messengers with a gospel message. As was his custom, he broke the ice by inquiring as to the boy’s name. “Everlastin’ “ came the reply. We were both a little stunned, and I had to fight back a small smile from the corners of my mouth. “Everlasting what?” my companion asked. “That’s it- just Everlastin’ “ our young friend replied in his gruffest and most gangsterly of tones. Again we tried not to laugh as this kid really did want to be respected and regarded as a man who meant business, but as we walked away later I couldn’t help but smile to myself and reflect on that product of the ghetto. Jim A. - Utah

I Would Exhort Ya'll

While teaching a young women in North Carolina about the Book of Mormon, we got to the promise that Moroni gives to all of us to know if what we are reading is true. Forgetting that most people we taught were not used to reading from the Bible and when they did it was from a version that was in everyday language, we asked her if she would read verses 3 through 5 and tell us how she felt about it.

Here's how it went when our Southern Belle read them:
"Behold, I would exhort ya'll that when ya'll shall read these things, if it be wisdom in God that ya'll should read them, that ya'll would remember how merciful the Lord hath been unto the children of men…"

I had never heard the term "ya'll" used in quite that context, but it worked beautifully and she still got the message. Marianne J. - Utah

A Man Named Hilda

For 9 of the 18 months of my mission, I served part time in the mission office. I was responsible for getting the paperwork from Salt Lake City for the media referrals that came in for our mission. I would then call out the information to the missionaries so they could deliver whatever media the person had ordered. I served in the southern states and we would usually run across peculiar and hard to pronounce names, but we would do our best when relaying that information to the missionaries

One afternoon as I was calling out referrals to the missionaries I was pleased to run across a name that I recognized and could actually pronounce correctly. Since the missionary couple I was calling wasn't at home I was leaving a message, so here's how the message went.

"Hi, Elder and Sister C, this is Sister J, I have a media referral for you. It's for a Bible and it's for a man…(pause)…it's for a man named Hilda." That's as far as I got. After I realized what I had read, and had double-checked that the referral was indeed for a man named Hilda who lived in Georgia, I was lost to giggles. I had to hang up and just laugh. It took me 4 additional messages to get through the entire information before laughter would get the better of me. The missionary couple tape-recorded those messages and have since given me a copy, but not before it was played for all to hear at Zone Conference. Marianne J - Utah